“Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5)
On May 5, 1991, God performed a miracle in my life. He saved me. I still shake my head and wonder how he could love someone who had repeatedly demonstrated such contempt for him.
My salvation story is not all that unusual. A lifetime of wrong choices caught up with me. As a friend put it, “Sometimes God has to put you on your back in order to get you to look up.”
That’s exactly what happened to me. Sin’s toll had finally caught up with me. I was helpless and the direction in which I saw my life heading seemed hopeless.
It’s hard to believe now, but I actually began to think about suicide. I never thought I would consider such an alternative, but I had nowhere else to turn. In my downstairs bathroom that night, I finally looked up to God in complete despair. I got down on my knees and made God a promise that I had never kept before: “Lord, if you will just get me out of this mess, I promise you I’ll change.”
God heard my prayer that night and planted seeds of conviction in my heart. For the next few days, I began to realize that my feelings of hopelessness really were true. I now understand what Paul meant when he said, “For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23)
That was enough to convince me to ask Jesus for eternal help.
Seven weeks after becoming a Christian, I lost my job. I couldn’t believe it. The God who had reached down and saved me seemed to have turned his back on me. Nothing could have been farther from the truth.
The fact is the loss of my job is also an answer to prayer. After all, I asked God to deliver me from the hopeless circumstances in which I found myself and he responded.
God love us in spite of what we may think or what the circumstances may suggest. His Word tells us time and time again that he will not turn his back on us. “For the Lord your God is a merciful God; he will not abandon or destroy you.” (Deuteronomy 4:31) Christians can and must rely on his promises.
God answers to our prayers are always perfect in spite of what we may think. That’s what I like most about this poem. It reminds us that sin and pride both have an “I” in the middle.
As children bring their broken toys
With fears for us to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God,
Because he was my friend.
But then instead of leaving Him
In peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help
In ways that were my own.
Finally I took them back and said,
“Dear God, why are you so slow?”
“My child,” He said, “What could I do?
You never did let go.”
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