“He shall judge the world in righteousness, and he shall administer judgment for the peoples in uprightness.” (Psalms 9:8)
I am grateful for God’s grace and mercy in my life. I see it every day and often wonder, “Why me?” I also ask the same question when I get frustrated, even angry with God.
For example, many years ago, my then eleven-year-old daughter telephoned me in a rush of panic and fear, 300 miles away. Sadly all I could do was listen. The distance between us prevented me from putting my arms around her and letting her know everything was going to be all right. In short, I couldn’t be the father that she needed.
When I got off the telephone, I told my wife about the conversation. Robbie got right down on her knees, held my hand, and prayed for her. When she finished, I just looked at her and said, “He didn’t hear a word of it”.
Well honestly that’s how I felt. Divorce was denying me the opportunity to be the father my daughter needed. How could God let this happen? I just wanted to scream at him, the same way Gene Hackman screamed at him through the character of Reverend Frank Scott in the 1972 movie, The Poseidon Adventure. If you’re too young to remember, a luxury cruise liner, the S.S. Poseidon, had capsized from a tidal wave on New Year’s Eve. When the dust settles, a handful of survivors, led by Hackman, a liberal, self-determined preacher, decides to work their way to the hull of the ship, which is now above water. Since everything is upside down, their decision to make their way to the hull proves far more difficult than they originally calculated, prompting Scott to give God a piece of his mind.
I later shared my anger with my Sunday School Class. “Tell me,” I asked them, “Where do you go in God’s Word for comfort in times like these?”
I realized as we shared some verses with each other that all of us from time to time experience the same frustration, anger and confusion that I experienced. And I learned something else: It’s okay to let God know how you feel. As one of my class members said, “He knew how you felt anyway”.
Even Jesus got a little frustrated with God. He knew he was going to take on the sins of the world, but in the Garden of Gethsemane he said, “Abba, Father… everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me.” (Mark 14:3)
I find great comfort in that verse. It reminds me that it’s okay to let God know when I’m confused or angry. How could you have a deep relationship with anyone if you can’t express your innermost feelings?
I am also comforted by something one of my Sunday School class members gave me. It came from Oswald Chamber’s Devotional, My Utmost for His Highest:
“Every time you venture out in your life of faith, you will find something in your circumstances that, from a commonsense standpoint, will flatly contradict your faith. But common sense is not faith, and faith is not common sense. In fact, they are as different as the natural life and the spiritual. Can you trust Jesus Christ where your common sense cannot trust him? Can you venture out with courage on the words of Jesus Christ, while the realities on your commonsense life continue to shout, ‘It’s all a lie’? When you are on the mountain top, it’s easy to say, ‘Oh yes, I believe God can do it,’ but you to come down from the mountain to the demon-possessed valley and face the realities that scoff at your Mount-of-Transfiguration belief…Faith must be tested, because it can only become your intimate possession through conflict.”
When storms come our way, we often forget some of the most important promises that God made. I forgot a really special one: “”Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5)
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