“So when the centurion and those with him, who were guarding Jesus, saw the earthquake and the things that had happened, they feared greatly, saying, “Truly this was the Son of God!” (Matthew 27:54)
When you stop and think about it, there is a wonderful salvation story revealed in this verse because that Roman Centurion was the first man to believe that Jesus died on the Cross to save him. I am sure he felt the shame that many of us felt when our eyes were first opened to the sin that had so dominated our lives. I think that’s what John Newton, who penned the song, Amazing Grace, meant when he wrote:
Amazing grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.
I believe the Apostle Paul experienced a sense of shame after he came to a saving knowledge of Jesus on the Damascus Road. In fact, the Bible records that shortly after Paul was saved, he spent three years in the desert. There’s no doubt in mind that he, too, experienced the wave of shame that Christians who are saved later in life often feel. I think that’s why he once said, “Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:12-14)
What we’re really talking about here is the tremendous guilt that can come from experiencing God’s grace. We realize that we don’t deserve the salvation that came so freely. The Bible says that God’s forgiveness is complete. Our sins are totally forgotten. Yet, many of us still seem to be unable to let go of the guilt and shame that come from the realization of what we have done.
Forgiveness isn’t complete until we forgive ourselves. I made that statement in my Sunday School class recently when a recently saved brother asked, “How do you do that?”
It was a great question and I realized as I looked into his eyes that they were now open to sin. His past was beginning to haunt him as it had once haunted me, and so many of us who came to know Jesus later in life.
I believe the answer lies in another spiritual truth, which is that there’s another force at work in our lives, too. Satan often masquerades as light, but the truth is all that confusion that comes with salvation is an attack from the devil himself. He didn’t have to work so hard before we came to know the Lord. But now he’s working overtime to win us back to sin. It’s Satan that is hanging all that guilt and shame around our necks.
The very heart of the gospel is the supreme truth that God accepts us with no conditions when we put our trust in the atoning sacrifice of His incarnate Son. Although we are helplessly sinful, God in grace forgives us completely. It’s by his infinite grace that we are saved; not by moral character, works of righteousness, commandment-keeping, or church-going. When we do nothing else but accept God’s total pardon, we receive the guarantee of eternal life.
The Apostle Paul’s advice is so simple, yet so difficult to follow. The road ahead will not be easy. Indeed, we will strain, but must press on. However, the journey will be much easier if we would just trust in God’s forgiveness and forget what we have left behind. At the end of the day, that’s what faith is all about – trusting what we cannot see.
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